Yup, its a very long time since I last blogged. I know, I am being pompous about it, but I don't have any other way out. Okay, let's start with defining what are bad memories. The dictionary meaning of bad memories is some bad remembrances from the past which haunt you in the present and will tend to haunt you in the time to come. These are things which in any form will create problems in the long run, as they will make you feel guilty, scared, ashamed of yourself, you will dislike it, no matter what may come.
Such is my case. After two long pathetic years of my life I come to the assumption that bad memories are a part of my life. I have made them come by way of my misdeeds or foolishness. I never wanted such bad memories, but the time and situation made things pathetic for me. I still remember the first day of my college when I came into this so called beautiful place, met new people, mingled with them, picked up good and bad habits, which have changed me. I regret the fact that I picked up more bad habits than the good ones. I literally dislike myself for the same. I can't help it. Then, I met this someone. This someone I met through my friends and roommates, who was supposed to be my batch-mate.
Her, I am breaking the line and stating as to why I am mentioning the person as someone. I, actually don't take names and it is not my habit of naming people. So, I won't disclose the name (sorry). This someone was a good friend of mine, but, I feel that this all was my assumption. I, really don't know why I felt that this someone was my good friend. Okay, let this someone be my good friend with whom I was into a good relation of friendship.
But, every good thing doesn't stay good for a long time. This is what happened with me. With the passage of time I felt that I was a fool, because other people thought that I have developed a liking for this someone and am pursuing the so called someone.
I still remember the last time when this someone was very friendly and caring for the last time with me, till one day, some problem cropped up leading to a complete stoppage of mine being a good friend with this someone.
I felt bad, I thought it was my fault, I still don't know, whether it was my fault or someone else created a situation leading to me becoming faulty in front of this so called someone. I stopped talking to this someone, even didn't like to hear anything about this someone. Time drifted apart.
With time I thought everything will become okay, but things worsened. More problems cropped up. I didn't mind, but what else could I do. I was helpless.
Today, when this someone is leaving college and I said sorry to this person with tears in my eyes, the so called person comes up tome and says that because people made a mockery of me, this someone stopped associating with me. Isn't this a very bombastic bad memory for me. Now, I am truly helpless to the hilt.
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